Don’t piss off a hooker.

gotcha

Stick around the escort/hobbyist message boards long enough, you’re likely to see all manner of stupid behavior. Sometimes I think these guys want to get caught.

I had a friend…

He was active on one of the sleazier local message boards, a big guy, highly trusted. If you wanted to get “in” with someone on the board, he was the guy who’s ring you had to kiss. A funny, affable guy, always willing to lend a hand.  There was a time when he would post a hundred times a day. He had dozens of reviews under his belt. This was a guy who was hooked up, plugged in, connected. I haven’t seen him lately. Wasn’t at the last meet & greet, he’s no longer an active participant on any of the boards, and he hasn’t written a new review in ages.

He’s also unemployed.

So what happened, what went wrong? And what does this have to do with not getting caught fucking hookers? My friend should have known better, but he got stupid. And it kicked him right in the balls.

One of the recurring topics of discussion on the hobbyist boards is ‘falling in love with a hooker.’ There are a lot of pros and cons to that particular situation, and they’ve been discussed ad nauseam. Personally, I think one of the reasons this keeps cropping up is the unspoken fantasy many “hobbyists” have that they’ll be so good, so studly, so irresistible that the high-dollar hottie will fall madly in love with him and leave behind her sordid life of hot sex and big bucks. Not to say that it never happens or can’t happen, but chances are it won’t happen. I believe that in life, one must always be open to all possibilities, but it’s also wise to be aware of boundaries. But this isn’t a story of falling in love with an escort. Just the opposite. What got my friend into trouble, and eventually cost him his job was a different kind of obsession.

Certain characteristics inherent in online technologies increase the likelihood that they will be exploited for deviant purposes. The escort message, advertising and review boards are built for anonymity. And deviant purposes.  And unlike being a bully in person, electronic bullies can remain virtually anonymous using temporary email accounts, pseudonyms in chat rooms; this, they think, frees them from normal social constraints on their behavior.

This erstwhile friend would spend hours and hours every day on the message board. And he started to believe his own hype; that his exalted ‘trust’ level was not only a cudgel he could wield against those escorts who disagreed with him, but also a wall he could hide behind for safety. He took a turn from flirting and being the jovial good guy into haranguing, harassing and hounding girls online. Electronic forums often lack supervision, and cyber bullies (or ‘trusted’ hobbyists) often feel emboldened by their perceived anonymity, their perceived power, their perceived attractiveness. Hiding behind the screen name allows them to launch attacks and carry out an antagonistic agenda because it takes less energy and courage to express hurtful comments using a keyboard than face to face.

Gossip, drama and innuendo are always on the menu on the message boards, and this one was no different. My once-upon-a-time friend felt invincible. He had been on the board for a long time and had a long, long, long list of supporters, followers and sycophants. So when girls would argue with him, disagree with him or just plain call him on his bullshit, he spared no effort on attacking them. But because he had felt invincible for so long, he let his guard down. He thought nothing of boasting about his high-profile job, he used his real name on the boards, he often posted his own picture. And the incessant posting. Hour after hour, day in and day out.

And when finally, the subjects of his ongoing attacks had reached the end of their patience, they struck back. They banded together to put him in his place. Hookers started calling his office. They called his boss, they called corporate headquarters, they called human resources. Seems that major multi-national corporations don’t look favorably on their employees spending their work hours perusing the hooker boards, connecting through the company Internet portal. Specially a company that has their employees sign a morals clause in their employment contract.

My former friend had it all. And he lost it all. He had a nice home, a good job, and all the pussy he could handle. And he threw it all away for self-aggrandizement on a hooker review board. He didn’t respect the boundaries and he didn’t respect the escorts.

But, hey, you’re different, right? Or maybe you’re OK with being in your 40’s, divorced, unemployed and living with your parents.

Not good for outcalls, but at least Mom does your laundry

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Comments
  1. First time visiting your site, aag told me about it. Saw your tweet about message boards pissing you off – I AGREE! I can’t stand them. So cliquish and high school, breeds bullshit and disrespect. I hate drama.

    I notice most of the hobbyists in town are spoiled brats who feel a sense of entitlement after being with so many beautiful women. Not the kind of people I want to spend time with. Even their emails are rude. I operate on mutual respect. I might be someone’s dream come true and source of great pleasure, but I’m not anyone’s hobby.

  2. Brooke says:

    Sounds like your old friend got what he deserved!

  3. Kinkydad says:

    Wow. A word to the wise. I don’t go in for the online drama. To much hassle, to much danger.

    You’re an excellent writer. Keep it up.